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English as She is Wrote

Book Overview: 

Showing Curious ways in which the English Language may be made to convey Ideas or obscure them." A collection of unintentionally humorous uses of the English language. Sections of the work: How she is wrote by the Inaccurate, By Advertisers and on Sign-boards, For Epitaphs, By Correspondents, By the Effusive, How she can be oddly wrote, and By the Untutored.

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Book Excerpt: 
. . .N. B. bawl on friday nite—prayer meetin chuesday—also salme singing by the quire."

The following notice appeared on the fence of a vacant lot in Brooklyn: "All persons are forbidden to throw ashes on this lot under penalty of the law or any other garbage."

[Pg. 26]

A barber's sign in Buffalo, N.Y., has the following: "This is the place for physiognomical hair-cutting and ecstatic shaving and shampooing."

A San Francisco boot-black, of poetic aspirations, proclaims his superior skill in the following lines, pasted over the door of his establishment:

"No day was e'er so bright,
So black was never a night,
As will your boots be, if you get
Them blacked right in here, you bet!"

The following appears on a Welsh shoemaker's sign-board: "Pryce Dyas Coblar, dealer in Bacco Shag and Pig Tail Bacon and Ginarbread, Eggs laid by me, and very good Paradise in the summer, Gentlemen and Lady can have go. . . Read More

Community Reviews

Not worth your time. Too many better books of this ilk available; -- see Ambrose Bierce for instance.

Skip it.

Hilarious!

Funny and instructive, January 21, 2016

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This review is from: English as She is Wrote Showing Curious Ways in which the English Language may be made to Convey Ideas or obscure them. (Kindle Edition)

I commend this to anyone who has occasion to communicate by writing in...more