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The Journal of a Disappointed Man

W. N. P. Barbellion

Book Overview: 

The journal of British naturalist Bruce Frederick Cummings, spanning from his early childhood through to his early death from complications stemming from multiple sclerosis. The diary combines beautiful, lyrical passages concerning the natural world with more introspective ruminations reminiscent of Kafka. However, Cummings' work is very modern is its forthright confessional tone and contains some deeply moving pieces of writing not easily forgotten.

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Book Excerpt: 
. . . delightful it is worth repeating a hundred times. In this position I read of the decline and fall of Trilobites, of the Stratigraphy of the Lias and so on. Geology is a very crushing science, yet I enjoyed my existence this morning with the other flies about that stream.

June 20.

Sat at Liverpool University for the practical exam. Zoology, Board of Education.

At the close the other students left but I went on working. Prof. Herdman asked me if I had finished. I said "No," so he gave me a little more time. Later he came up again, and again I said "No," but he replied that he was afraid I must stop. "What could you do further?" he asked, picking up a dish of plankton. I pointed out a Sagitta, an Oikopleura, and a Noctiluca, and he replied, "Of course I put in more than you were expected to identify in the time, so as to make a choice possible." Then he complimented me on my written papers which were sent in some weeks ago, and looking at my pra. . . Read More

Community Reviews

Do you want to read the journal of a guy with an irrepressible delight in all living creatures, a loving wife, a little baby, a brilliant way with our English language and a fatal disease?

Let’s let Mr Barbellion describe himself :

I am over 6 feet high and as thin as a skeleton; every bone in my bod

I discovered this lost gem through the brilliant Backlisted podcast, which in itself has been a glimmer of light in the long weeks and months of 2020. There are many reviews on here which pay homage to the work and do it a fine justice, so I'll leave it to Barbellion himself to draw the prospective

Soy  lectora por libros como éste. Libros que te conmueven, que te hacen reír y llorar, releer y reflexionar, anotar muchos fragmentos. Suspirar.

Nunca llegué a leer este Diario cuando pasó delante de mí, cuando me juzgaba desde el estante hace quince o quizá veinte años (¿veinte? ¿En serio?). Mi yo

"Am mers cum am putut pe cărări până pe deal și m-am așezat pe câmp, la soare, rezemat de o căpiță de fân. De tristețe, am rămas atât de nemișcat, încât muștele și lăcustele s-au apropiat și s-au așezat pe mine. M-am înfuriat. Le-am spus: "N-am murit încă, la o parte!" și le tot goneam... O neferici

Couldn't recommend this enough, probably the most underrated of modern literary classics. How can you beat this:
"To me the honour is sufficient of belonging to the universe — such a great universe, and so grand a scheme of things. Not even Death can rob me of that honour. For nothing can alter the

I can't remember the last book where I underlined as many lines, as in The Journal of a Disappointed Man, or laughed as much, or cried. Actually cried, quiet rolling tears, while my husband slept beside me in bed.
This journal starts in 1903 when Barbellion (a pen-name) is 13 and wants desperately t

This journal, first published in 1919, spans 14 years in the life of its author and starts when he was only 13.
Barbellion was a brilliant and self-taught naturalist who could never fully fulfill his colossal ambitions due to his ill-health. It taught him how to live with a sense of impending doom ve

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